I…really need to use this more.  Kind of fail.

 

BUT! Check it.  Give away and fun contest! http://www.lipsticksandlightsabers.com/2011/08/because-any-alternative-is-better.html

Choices, Choices

So apparently is either dishes, or shower day, if I want to have enough energy to make dinner.  I’m choosing to take a shower, because we may be having dinner out with friends, and I feel disgusting.

I hate days like today.  If i’m feeling up to it, there will be a deep post, later today/tomorrow.

Drowning in Feelings

I feel like I’m lost inside myself lately.  I’m avoiding everyone, and everything.  I feel down a lot, but I hated the feeling I had when I was on medication. I’m really torn on what to do.  I feel more….normal, not on meds, but I’m happier on them.  Or maybe it suppresses my feelings?  Although I have to admit, the last few months, even on meds, I was feeling really mixed up.  Maybe I wasn’t on the right combination or something. I know I need to get into the doctor, but once again we can’t afford it.  I’m getting kind of frustrated with that.  What’s the point of being on something that will let you afford your medications, if you can’t see the doctor to *get* said meds.  And of course, I don’t tell my husband any of this, I just keep it all inside. Make decisions I probably shouldn’t make. That i’m in all honesty, probably not in the right mind to be able to make.

I’m not eating when I should, because I don’t care.  I know I need to..take care of myself, in some aspects, so that no one catches on, that something is really wrong.

It also doesn’t help, that I’m totally lost on what I want to do with my life.  It seems like everyone I know, has a plan, or is doing something. Meanwhile, I sit around and do nothing worth anything, because theres nothing I’m exceptional at.  Nothing I’m even remotely good at.  I have no ambition to try new things.  I have no encouragement, really, to try new things. How am I supposed to “find myself” when I’m afraid of failing, and I don’t want to turn to anyone for help?  What do you do then?

Things on my brain

So, i’ve been wondering.  What classifies something as literature?  What makes it so different from regular writing and fiction?  Is it the historical value?  Because it’s timeless?  But we have contemporary literature, which seems to be more modern.  Maybe I just don’t get it.

Hello world!

So, I’m starting this in an attempt to actually write about things that go on.  I had a livejournal, but i just don’t feel comfortable there anymore, so here I am!

Books so far this year

I hope to make this post at least once a month.  I don’t have a goal of a certain number of books to read, just what I can.  So far this year I’ve read:

The Official Chuck Norris Fact Book by Chuck Norris

The Lovely Bones by Alice Sebold

The Complete Persepolis by Marjane Satrapi

Peter and Max by Bill Willingham

Percy Jackson and the Olympians: The Lightning Thief  by Rick Riordan

Wow, really? only 5 so far?  Although, I suppose I did start only a month ago.  We’ll see if I can keep this up! I think next on the list is Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland & Through the Looking Glass.  or Cirque du Freak. Not sure.